What would you do if you’re being goofy with your long distance bae and they suddenly make a joke about using other men as sex toys? Awkward, right? You’d probably feel bummed—maybe just for a moment—but enough to wonder: Is this one of those long distance relationship cheating signs I’ve read about online?

So, here’s the real question: Was it funny? Hurtful? Or maybe both? 

Let’s dive into this LDR thread on Reddit that went viral and see what lessons we can take away from the mess.

What’s Going On Here? 

Let’s be real: cheating in a long distance relationship is way too common, and it’s literally the number one thing no one wants to deal with. And yet, Reddit’s long distance relationship threads are packed with steamy, awkward, and relatable stories about infidelity. 

If you’ve ever scrolled through cheating in long distance relationship Reddit threads, you know the drama is real! This viral story? Basically, this guy’s girlfriend made a “joke”, then flipped it on him for feeling uncomfortable—leaving him wondering, “Am I overthinking this, or do I actually have a point?”

So Here’s What Really Happened:

It’s been over a month since the original poster (OP) and his girlfriend last met, and naturally, they missed the physical intimacy. During a phone call, the OP suggested she could use a sex toy if it helped her until they saw each other again.

Her reply? “Only the toy?”

Curious and a little taken aback, the OP asked if she meant “other men.” 

Her response? “Partially.” 

She quickly brushed it off, calling it a bad joke and insisting he should just ignore it.

But the OP couldn’t. The comment stung. 

When he tried to express his feelings, his girlfriend flipped the situation, asking why he felt so insulted when it was “just a joke.”

The OP couldn’t wrap his head around how his reaction became the issue, especially since the joke implied her using other men as sex toys. 

He even asked her how she would feel if the roles were reversed—if he joked about using other women in the same way. She admitted she wouldn’t like it but still insisted he was overreacting.

While the OP acknowledged he might have been a little sensitive, he firmly believed the joke crossed a line.

Pretty intense, right? 

Why Did This Joke Hit Hard? Let’s Break It Down

Okay, so this situation has layers:

• Firstly, it seems like what’s funny for the girlfriend is not funny to OP. Probably they both have different ways of joking or teasing each other. 
• Secondly, even if the girlfriend was genuinely joking, we can’t invalidate OP’s feelings of anger, insecurity and betrayal, especially when you are already dealing with distance.  
• Thirdly, it may be a genuine mistake by the girlfriend and she might not have anticipated that the “joke” could be misinterpreted in the way OP did. So, we can give her the benefit of the doubt! 

Also Read: Wondering How to Make Your Long Distance Partner Feel Loved? 5 Tips Inside!

How Do You Handle a Mess Like This in a Long Distance Relationship?

See, we’ve all been there—long-distance relationships are rough, right? And situations like this? They’re way more common than you’d think. Honestly, you can’t always pin the blame on one person—it’s not that black and white. 

Sometimes, when you’re in the middle of a situation, everything feels bigger than it actually is. You start overthinking, wondering if you’re seeing long distance relationship cheating signs or just making a mountain out of a molehill. Been there, right?

That’s why platforms like Reddit are such a lifesaver. Stories like OP’s give us all a little wake-up call—a chance to step back, see the bigger picture, and think, 

“Okay, if this happens to me, how do I not let it blow up?” 

It’s like free relationship advice, minus the awkward therapy session.

3 Takeaways to Ensure This Mess Doesn’t Happen to You

• Talk It Out

Seriously, it’s crazy how people can spill their deepest feelings to random strangers online but can’t have the same conversations with their partner?! Like, OP could’ve just told her everything he wrote in his post (but, you know, respectfully). He could’ve said, 

“Hey, I’m not cool with those kinds of jokes” 

And she could’ve been like, “Whoa, I didn’t think it would hurt you like that!” 

• Listen to Understand, Not Just Respond

But here’s the thing: talking it out is one thing—actually understanding each other? That’s a whole other story. OP did share his feelings (gold star for effort), but his girlfriend was too busy defending her “it’s just a joke” stance to really hear him out. And let’s be real, OP could’ve maybe taken a breath and thought, “Okay, maybe it was just a bad joke.”

At the end of the day, it’s about trying—trying to say what you feel and trying to understand what the other person means. Because without both? Yeah, good luck.

• Know When a Joke Isn’t Funny

Let’s be real: jokes are tricky. What’s funny to one person can hit a little too close to home for someone else. And when it comes to sensitive topics—like trust or fidelity—you’ve got to tread carefully. Respecting your partner’s boundaries isn’t just important; it’s essential.

In this situation, the girlfriend probably didn’t mean to hurt OP’s feelings, but her joke clearly crossed a line for him. At the same time, OP could’ve tried to see where she was coming from—maybe it really was just an offhand, poorly thought-out joke. 

Respect works both ways: it’s about knowing what’s okay to joke about and understanding when something might sting, even if you didn’t mean it to. At the end of the day, a little more respect for each other’s feelings can go a long way.

What Would You Have Done If It Was You?

We’ve shared our take, but what’s yours? What would you have done if you were in this situation? Tell us in the comments—we’re all ears! 💕

Editor